How is it that some people can overcome poverty and harsh environments, and yet others remain stuck in their same situation? I’ve had a wide variety of friends growing up and when I look at the most successful friends I have and their habits, I’ve found 10 things that stand in common between them. Now don’t get me wrong, there are many other contributing factors. But if I had to break it down to just 10, these are the most apparent that stood out to me.
1. They believe in themselves and their vision.
Confidence is key. It doesn’t matter where you start in life or what resources you have. Having faith in your personal ability is key at being successful in anything in life. That doesn’t mean you don’t think you will fail. But having confidence that no matter what, you will be able to push forward. They’ve given up believing they can’t change the world.
2. They don’t rely on fate.
The people that get on in life are the ones that make things happen. They explore the odds and strategize on how to put themselves in the best position to win. They’ve traded luck for “hustle”. They understand talent alone will not win the race.The harder you work the luckier you get.
3. They have a growth mindset.
Your mind is a powerful tool. The stories you tell yourself and the things you believe about yourself can either prevent change from happening or allow new skills to blossom. As a result, people who have a growth mindset are more likely to maximize their potential. They tend to learn from criticism rather than ignoring it, to overcome challenges rather than avoiding them, and to find inspiration in the success of others rather than feeling threatened. They learn from their mistakes and use them to get better. People with a fixed mindset will avoid experiences where you might feel like a failure. As a result, you don’t learn as much and it’s hard to get better.
4. They’re always seeking knowledge.
The day you stop learning is the beginning of the end. My most successful friends are always seeking information. In the age of information ignorance is a choice. But they don’t just seek the information, they also apply it. They learn from those before them who have already gotten the results they are seeking.
5. They focus on the process not the outcome.
Is this you:
- What if I fail?
- What if things don’t go as planned?
- What will people think of me if I don’t do well?
Or is this you?
- I’m always up for a new challenge!
- I’m about to give this my very all!
- I will become better in order to complete the task!
The difference between the two, when you are focused on the outcome and you attach your worth to the outcome, you will find yourself very resistant to trying new things and putting forth your best effort. When you define your worth by your performance rather than your effort, you prevent yourself from reaching your potential. When your sense of worth is attached to the effort you make and putting forth your very best, then the process itself becomes exciting and rewarding, regardless of the outcome. In fact, people who define themselves through effort rather than outcomes do not think much about the outcome. While they have goals, and they certainly want to achieve their goals, they are not focused in the future on the goal. Instead, they are in the present moment, putting forth full effort in their desire to be all they can be.
6. They embrace change.
The old saying goes “if you always do what you’ve always done, you will always get what you’ve always got.” You want something different then you have to do something different. The most successful aren’t afraid to step outside their comfort zone. They understand growth is essential in the process.
7. They changed their circle of influence.
Successful people surround themselves with other success people. They find people in the position they want to be in and emulate their habits. They do what the money makers do. Negative people can bring you down, often these people are not those who are depressed or suffering from some tragic life disaster, the dangerous ones are just normal people around you. When taking advice look at the person giving it and ask yourself this, “Are they currently in a position I want to be in?”
8. They own their mistakes.
Making mistakes is inevitable. I played sports in my youth and remember my coach telling me “son if your going to make a mistake, make it at 100mph.” And that has always stuck with me. In the process, you will have set backs and short comings. There will be times where you completely call the wrong play. Recognizing where you misfired and making the adjustment is what successful people do. They understand that when they fall short, they have an opportunity to get better.
9. They’ve burned their boats.
Plan B is to make plan A work. You have to have a “failure is not an option” mentality. Having an escape route will distract you from completing your task. You create a subliminal rubicon river, a line that when crossed permits of no return and typically results in irrevocable commitment. Focus your mind on one thing, and one thing only- success. It’s extraordinary what you are capable of when you are in a corner, with no other option but to give your absolute best. We don’t focus on odds. Our mind tends to find whatever we are looking for. If we’re seeking out excuses to fail or to justify our decision not to push forward, we’ll find them – in the form of set backs, constraints and limitations. But if we obsess about finding a way past any of these restraints and breaking through to the level of success we set out in search of, then magically we discover these solutions.
10. They stopped giving up.
There are many different traits that will contribute to the success of any individual. However, I feel the common denominator my most successful friends have is their grit. Their ability to get knocked down 10 times and get back up 11. Perseverance is one of the most important skills you can have. And it’s just that, a skill. Like any other skill in the world, you might be born with a more natural ability to persevere than others, but you can learn to stick with things and persevere if you want to. In fact, the one thing that sets people I know who succeed in the long run over the people who don’t is the ability to persevere, keep going and never give up.
Written By: Freedom team Member